Rutlish 1957 - the 50 Year Reunion
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Dave W A Ealey

1957	1958	1961	"Recent"

Dave Ealey at the Reunion on 1 September 2007

Notes by Dave Ealey

I took the advice of elders and betters in the summer of '62 and applied for a job with Westminster Bank. This offered security and a pension, bywords from the family around me. Despite lack of school qualifications they took me on on the basis of "how many "O" levels do you predict you will pass". I offered a cautious 4, and by the time my 4 month probation was completed I wasn't asked this question again and was on the permanent staff. I played cricket for them for many years until my body gave up on me, and recall those times with great affection. In fact, I played against the Old Ruts on more than one occasion but failed to recognise any of the opposition.

In my teens I spent a lot of off school time with Kenny Messenger, Lynn Allen, Trevor Musk, Keith Ashfield and our friend from St Mary's School down the road, Ken Frost. We had some great times with our first non-parented holidays, and many hours spent lazing at other not very productive but fun pursuits.

In my 20's though it all got a bit serious. Still in Morden, got married in 1968 to Angela, and still happily with her today. 2 children, James now 33, and Sarah now 30. The larking about had to stop in '68 and a career overview undertaken. Passed a lot of Bank exams (which I was told were "A" level equivalents), and started climbing the greasy corporate pole.

Through the change of Westminster to NatWest, 34 years at 17 different locations in and around London ending up as a Senior Manager before retiring in 1996. Living in Epsom then, but moved to Seaford on the south coast in 2001. Did quite a few part-time jobs after retirement and today I'm keeping my brain ticking over happily working part-time at a museum in the beautiful Sussex countryside.

My best pal is still Ken Frost from Hillcross & St Mary's, and he lives with his family 5 minutes away in Seaford.

Dave Ealey
9 August 2007

Reflections by Dave Ealey

I'm not sure that an emotion or sentiment exists that can entirely encompass how I feel/felt about 1st September 2007.

Apart from one or two where intermittent contact had taken place, how do you strike up conversations with men that were boys as you were the last time you spoke to them? My last conversation with most was when I was 16. There was a gap of 45 years to the "now". In truth, we may have had lots in common then but it was likely we would have little in common now.

When the re-union was first mooted my initial thoughts were that it was a cracking idea and how intriguing it would be to see the 1957 crew again. But as the date drew nearer I was slowly being overtaken by apprehension, doubt and questioning the worth of meeting up again. At one point I wasn't sure I wanted to turn up. That would have been a big mistake.

This was a one chance only. One day in my life. Including travel time about 10 hours of my existence. I would have regretted it and it would be gone. It would never happen again the way it actually happened on Saturday.

I pulled into the car park a little behind the scheduled start and walked through the pavilion door. This was it. Trevor was near by and this was my safety net. Trevor and his wife Margaret are long term friends and this eased the path a bit. I was directed to the name badge booth to be greeted not only by Margaret but by the beaming smile and re-assuring presence of one Ian Newton. Tension eased rapidly, how can you be so self concerned when someone who supports Kingstonian FC is still alive, well and apparently happy? Knowingly, his wife Christine was alongside obviously keeping him under control. Ian has also worked hard on this project and another "thank you" is given.

One of my early fears prior to the day was that there may be an element of "Who did better than whom". I am so pleased that this didn't happen. There was obviously a diversity of talent among the assembled and it did come to the fore that most there seemed content with their lot with no-one claiming bragging rights. What a compliment to the modesty of all concerned.

Later in the day there was a moment of serious reflection for those that had passed away, especially for me and the other Hillcross boys who had lost 3 of their colleagues. It was also unfortunate for those who couldn't attend for one reason or another. And for those that didn't want to attend I hope they visit the website and draw something that will perhaps bring a cheer to them if they spend a moment to look back. It really wasn't the school; it was our classmates that made Saturday's reminiscences worthwhile.

Talking of the website, this is more than a bit special, all down to Colin Hicks. What an incredible achievement. Another "well done" is definitely in order.

Suitably attired with my name badge the mingling began. Along with others I peered at lapels as well as faces to be sure my eyes weren't deceiving me. How quickly everyone moved around all sharing whatever recollections came to mind whilst simultaneously being reminded of things that had been locked away in a corner of the brain for 40 odd years. For a great many, waistlines had expanded, much or most of the 60's large hair had disappeared, and spectacles sat on noses of those who had no need of them years ago.

Then a lunch (well done Old Ruts) which was preceded by Grace in Latin. OK, so Doerr knew it off by heart (allegedly), but I know heard it being recited around the room by others. Good grief.

This was followed by a short address from Trevor. I know he's a good friend of mine and just to compliment him would be too easy. But what a devotion to a cause this re-union has been. Heavens knows how many phone calls he's made & how many emails he's produced. He has worked so hard for almost a year to put the show on the road and the result was not only truly memorable, but an acclamation of his unstinting perseverance and effort.

We are a lucky generation, our parents & teachers were rising from the austerity of the Second World War and we were blossoming at the beginning of the 60's revolution of being allowed to think that things might be better and to be part of that improvement. 1957 to 1965 witnessed huge social change and we were at the heart of it and taking it forward in our 20's and 30's. Age wise, the teachers appeared to be somewhere between my Father & my Grandfather, and the mark of military discipline, many times liberally exercised, probably came from their upbringing. I have more understanding of that now, but found it hard to accept that other boys could hit me just because they had extra pieces of braid on their jackets.

I have never thought of Rutlish fondly but maybe now with decades of hindsight it did teach me, albeit by default, what I needed to know to move on.

I hope others post their reflections as did some of the mini re-union guys; it will be something we can treasure a long time from now.

It was fantastic to meet so many old friends and here's to the next time!?

Finally, on a lighter note -

What was it about "smart casual" that Rod Burlinson interpreted as Hawaiian beachwear?

Dave Ealey
4 September 2007